This Week's Rumor Roundup: Apple, Apple, Apple

Lead with the worst joke, that's MY motto!
  • Apple to buy a Chinese game company?
    Overzealous rumor based on someone overhearing Jobs say that he was, "going to get some Chinese."
  • RIM's "BlackPad" to compete with the iPad?
    "Whoa, whoa, whoa!" says RIM, "No one here said 'compete'! YOU said 'compete'! I want to make that abundantly clear!" (RIM looks around, worried.) "We are SO cooked ..."
  • Apple to launch a streaming video service?
    Let's hope Apple is smart enough to ask the recently-acquired engineers (who have been put to work on this project) to remove the model of business. Otherwise, consumers will have the ability to watch a show / movie all the way through, once, then have to pay for repeated viewings.
  • Leaked next-gen iPod touch bezel reveals small hole?
    Is it for a front-facing camera? If so, get ready, far-away-living grandmas (or nanas, or me-maws, or gammies) to see your grandkids' first steps on a 4" screen! Or ... Is it Apple FINALLY implementing a feature I've been BEGGING for for, like, ever: A key ring hole! "This one's for my front door, this one is for the mailbox, and that's a very heavily scratched iPod touch."
  • Apple releasing new iPads, new iPods, new iPhones, and new bumpers?
    This rumor (which is a roundup in-and-of-itself — META!) probably came from someone who was reading my rumor roundup from a couple of months ago (double meta!) and mistook it for "hard hitting journalism." I know, it's an easy mistake to make!
Jeff Somogyi is the dealnews Media Editor. His hard-hitting journalistic style has won him several awards ... IN HIS MIND. Read more of his delusions @dzheough on Twitter.
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