5 Deals You Need to Know Today: A Touchscreen Toaster for $50
The evolution of the toaster is nigh. Check out this offer and more in our roundup of the five best deals we found over the last 24 hours.
Top Toaster Deal
Whall Smart 2-Slice Toaster with Touchscreen
$49.99Touchscreen toasters? Good gravy, think of the crumbs. No humble touchscreen should be subject to crumbage. It is a fundamental right of every touchscreen to avoid such coarse material. Then again, a toaster with this kind of precise cooking and timing options as result of touchscreenery does have its appeal. The solution is clear - I must spearhead a brand new line of toaster screen protectors, ensuring all can enjoy the benefits without the disastrous screen scratching drawbacks. You can save a phenomenal $350 on this toaster and I can get rich. No stealing my unpatented idea. That'd be mean.
Top Carlos Santana Deal
Santana by Carlos Santana Samba 40W Bluetooth Speaker
$12.99Carlos Santana is at it again, continuing to dabble in the rock and roll Latin American jazz fusion style he helped to pioneer. There's timbales and congas aplenty of cour- wait a minute. No excuse me, we're getting word that Mr. Santana has grown tired of playing music and now wants to construct Bluetooth speakers instead. Thus, he has taken a wild turn into electrical engineering, opting to create the Santana by Carlos Santana Samba 40W Bluetooth Speaker by hand, entirely by himself. 20 continuous hours of that one Santana song you know on loop? It's now possible thanks to Carlos' newfound speaker creation skills, all the while saving $12. Look forward to our check in next week, where he'll once again be opting for a career change in an effort to find something that sticks. Carlos Santana: Labubu Counterfeiter.
Top Laptop Deal
HP 13th-Gen. i3 15.6" Touch Laptop
$270If your search for laptops costing less than $300 led you here, then search engines are alive and well and working wonderfully. More than likely though, you've crash landed on thiss page against your will, so called AI involved and somehow no doubt responsible. Well, you're here now so it'd be rude not to take a moment to appreciate this HP 13th-Gen. i3 15.6" Touch Laptop for $270. It's the lowest price we've ever seen for it. You can quote me on that, if you must. For a reasonable fee.
Top Mashed Potato Deal
Linksys MX8000 Mesh WiFi-6 Router 2-Pack
$85Regrettably, the Linksys MX8000 Mesh WiFi-6 Router 2-Pack has been released with a very unfortunate critical flaw. A disastrous typo has caused many to think this is one of those fancy schmancy mesh network routers but this isn't a mesh router, it's a mash router. Yes, it's damn good at what it does but you'll need to submerge it in fresh mashed potatoes in order to get the most out of it. This is unconventional to be sure but new products on the cutting edge often are. Thus this mash router, first of its kind, undergoes a massive signal strength boost when surrounded by that sweet sweet mash and don't worry about it reaching the innards. This is explicitly encouraged as it actually increases internal component conductivity, thus increasing overall wireless networking performance. Wonderfully, this 2-pack is $10 below our mention from last November and a best-ever price at Amazon. The smart play is to make enough mash to both eat and cover your router in. Mash for all!
Top Shoes Deal
Hoka Men's Gore-Tex Tennine Waterproof Hiker Boot
$119.98Toaster screen protector. Carlos Santana falling into the Labubu craze. Mashed potato abuse. You've had to endure a lot today and as a thank you for sticking with me, I'll just say this about the Hoka Men's Gore-Tex Tennine Waterproof Hiker Boots. They're $155 off and hard to find in stock elsewhere. If however you jumped straight to this deal and didn't suffer through the rest of today's roundup then you have steadfastly earned my scorn, you dunderous oaf.
