Rumor Roundup: Apple to Stream Movies? Star Wars Land? Hulu Lock-Down?

When the Internet runs out of news, they start making things up. We think this is funny, so we round up all the lies and speculation and put them here. We call it "Rumor Roundup" and we do it all for you! This week:

• Apple in Talks with EPIX for Streaming Movie Content?
  This news caused Netflix's stock to drop 1.6%. Man, Netflix stock is like a fainting goat, these days. Anything can cause it to collapse. [Reuters]
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• Sony Put its Video Streaming Plans on Hold Because of Comcast Bandwidth Caps?
  Just like my parents put their future plans on hold to have me ... and look how well that turned out! (This was a joke, but now I'm sad, anyway.) [Variety]
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• Microsoft to Release a $99 Xbox ... with 2-Year Subscription Service?
  It'll include a Kinect and the service will be $15 a month. MATH TIME: $99 + $15 x 24 = ? More than the current Xbox with Kinect bundle and two years of Xbox LIVE does now! Is this an Abbot and Costello skit? "Do you have two tens for a five?" "Third base!" [The Verge]
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• Microsoft to Replace Zune Music with "Woodstock," a Spotify-like Streaming Service?
  "Woodstock" calls to mind so many positive musical images: Hippies covered in mud, bad LSD, and Snoopy's wing-ed companion. It's really hard to decide which name is worse. (And that's coming from someone who loves what Zune is!) [The Verge]
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• Hulu to Become Available Only to Cable Subscribers?
  I have a DVR with my cable, so I don't need to use Hulu anymore. You make it a necessity to have a cable or satelite subscription to use Hulu and you are essentially killing the service. I see what you're doing, there! [Time]
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• Disney Paris Will Add "Star Wars Land"?
  Surrounding a newly-renovated Star Tours ride, it'll feature a "cantina" and a chubby old man with a beard who runs around the park rearranging things all day, so you can never go back and experience it the way you remembered it the first time. [SlashFilm]
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