Bella Pro Blaze 750°F Pizza Oven+

As if the prospect of pizza wasn't already a great enough perpetual temptation, Best Buy is seeking to bring ultimate catastrophic ruin to us all by discounting this pizza oven to a monumental degree. This is unsurprisingly the best price we've ever seen it for (by a full $50) and it usually goes for around $200. Plus, it does other things too like broiling. I don't know what broiling is but the word itself is delightfully fun to say and it reminds of Phillip Broyles of X-Files-like Fringe, played by the late great Lance Reddick. Miss you Lance.

Fragrances at Woot

The most surprising thing in this sale probably isn't the low prices, or the free shipping via Prime. (It's an Amazon company, lest we forget.) The most surprising thing is how many musicians have signature fragrances available. So let's quiz it out. Which of these fragrances are real, and which are nonsense invented by me, the Staff Picks skeleton? GUESS!

Flexzilla Colors 5/8" x 5-Foot Lead-In Garden Hose

Tremble before the kaiju might of Flexzilla. Run in terror as he advances, slitheringly, with his hybrid polymer body. Look in horror as he flaunts his extreme all-weather flexibility. Scream with pure fear at the abrasion resistant outer cover and crush resistant anodized aircraft aluminum fittings covering him. Finally, take some solace in the fact that while your doom is imminent, this Flexzilla hose is available for nearly half off at the best price Amazon has ever charged.

Aoxun 10'x12' Outdoor Retractable Pergola

This retractable pergola at Walmart should not be mistaken for a retractable pigeon, as I read it upon first quick glance. A retractable pigeon would make little sense from a practical point of view, having questionable useful functionality. More importantly though, it would be morally dubious and highly unfair to the pigeon, who would surely have to live a highly compromised life to facilitate your retractable needs. The point being, be nice to pigeons! Or else. Another more useful point - this pergola is $160 off at Walmart and a solid deal for a pergola of this size. Do be aware of the $30 shipping fee.

Cole Haan End of Season Sale

I feel like if your name is Luke, you're morally obligated to wear at least one Cole Haan item at all times — Paul Newman-ness is next to godliness after all. So, Lukes of the world, and other interested parties, your time is now: coupon code "SUNSHINE" takes an extra 30% off hundreds of shoes, bags, and more. Hopefully we don't have a failure to communicate.