Rumor Roundup: Is the Apple Watch Water-Resistant?

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When the Internet runs out of news, it starts making things up. We think this is funny, so we round up all the lies and speculation and put them here. We call it the "Rumor Roundup" and we do it all for you! This week:

Apple Watch
  • Is the Apple Watch Waterproof Enough to Shower With?
    If that's what you're in to, I mean, hey, man, it's a free country. (Sicko.) [Apple Insider]

  • Is HP Buying WiFi Infrastructure Specialists Aruba Networks?
    It's either Aruba, Jamaica, Bermuda, Bahama, Key Largo, Montego, the Florida Keys, or Port au Prince. We'll have more as the story updates, way down in Kokomo ... [Computer World]

Dark Phoenix
  • Will Phoenix Allow Microsoft to Open a New Data Center?
    If she can heal the M'Kraan Crystal and shut off Scott's optic blasts, there's no limit to her power to open data centers, wherever she'd like! She is fickle, though, and could be easily corrupted by the Hellfire Club (Bill Gates in a bustier.) Note to editor: Trust me, this makes sense to several of our readers. [ABC 15]

  • Has the Next-Gen GoPro Camera Been Delayed?
    Aw, man! You mean I have to put up with these last-gen videos where cameras are strapped to sports equipment?! Rip off. [Ecumenical News]

Apple Car
  • Will the Apple Car Arrive in 2020?
    Yeah? Well, they all said we'd have jetpacks and flying cars by 2000, so I ain't holdin' my breath. (Unless that'll help, as a tactic to force Apple's hand, because they don't want me passing out? Headline: "Apple Announces Car To Prevent Rumor Roundup Blogger From Asphyxiating Himself!" You're all welcome.) [PowerPage]

  • Will the Apple Watch Have 100,000 Apps When It Launches?
    Ignore all the soundboards, flashlights, fart apps, and clones of the most popular soundboards, flashlights, and fart apps, and you're left with a much more reasonable total of 50. [Cult of Mac]


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Jeff Somogyi
Contributing Writer

Jeff Somogyi is constantly trying to come up with ways to surprise and delight audiences the world over. He takes humor seriously ... too seriously. (Honestly, we've never seen him laugh ... it's kinda creepy.)
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