- Starbucks to offer free WiFi? It's holding off on the roll-out until it can figure a way to make WiFi taste bitter, burnt, and scaldingly hot.
- Grand Theft Auto IV to feature multi-player action? With up to 16 players, that's 16 times as many atrocities that can be perpetrated in one game of GTA! (And 16 times as many "protect our children from this game" groups that will be formed, upon it's release.)
- Cisco to buy its way deeper and deeper into WiMAX tech? It will also be buying into "Duke Nukem Forever" technology and other products that will hit the market "some day".
- Perfect Dark 2? Microsoft says this one is "darker" than the original Perfect Dark. So ... um ... it wasn't quite "perfect" in its darkness, was it?! To paraphrase Nigel Tufnel in Spinal Tap: "It's like, how much more dark could this be? And the answer is none. None more dark."
- It's rumored that the rumors that Shatner will NOT appear in the new Star Trek film are only, themselves, rumors... If you have a rumor about another rumor not being true, does that cause some sort of instability in the universe? I KNEW that Shatner would, somehow, be involved in the apocalypse.
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