Rumors: Does Google Want to Mix Your Reality?

Every week for nine years, I've been rounding up the stupid rumors that can be found on the Internet ... and making fun of them. It is with no small sadness that I announce this will be my last Rumor Roundup! (Don't worry, the quality of jokes won't be any better in this final going-away roundup than it's been for the past near-decade!)

This week's "news":

• Will PlayStation's VR Helmet Be Wireless?
  After a batch of beta testers of the new VR Tasmanian Devil game were strangled by the wire, swift action had to be taken. [University Herald]
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• Is Google Working on a "Mixed Reality" Headset?
  Half virtual reality, half augmented reality, all a convenient way to escape from your dull, personal reality. [Android Headlines]
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• Will Allo, Google's New Messaging App, Be the Default Texting Platform on New Android Devices?
  Meanwhile, aloe is the default choice for sunburns. And the default choice for seeing wood-carved model ships when visiting the Bahamas is the Al Lowe Museum. [Android Headlines]
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• Will the New Canon 5D Mk IV Have a Never-Before-Seen-on-a-Camera Feature?
  Red eye enhancer? Image de-stabilization? Burst mode (where the camera literally bursts apart)? Reverse Flash?! What is it?! [Dive Photo Guide]
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• Will Apple Buy the Exclusive Rights to Formula 1 Racing?
  Look, back in the 90s when Apple phased out disk drives, I scoffed. But that seemed to work out OK. Let's see where this goes! [Auto Week]
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And that's it! Thanks to everyone who's read every single stupid joke I've written for this thing. It's been a blast. (Oh, and I should probably say this: I haven't been fired or anything, so you can look forward to — or dread — more irreverent words from me soon! Bye!