Rumor Roundup: Wonder Woman Movie? Metal Octopus? More?

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When the Internet runs out of news, it starts making things up. We think this is funny, so we round up all the lies and speculation and put them here. We call it the "Rumor Roundup" and we do it all for you! This week:

  • Is Samsung Building a Metal-Bodied Octo-Core Phone?
    I read "metal-bodied octa-" and got really excited. Then super disappointed when it wasn't followed up with "-pus". (Or "-pi". Or "-podi", depending on which grammarian you agree with.) [Digital Trends]

  • William Shatner Wants to Play Alfred in the Next Batman Movie?
    "Some ... MEN aren'tlookingfor ... ANYTHING logical. Some ... MEN ... just wanttowatchtheworld ... burn. Spock." (That totally sounds like Shatner ... in my head.) [Trek Web]

  • Will Wonder Woman Appear in the Batman/Superman Movie?
    After being criticized for lacking strong female characters in their movie, the film makers literally called in the strongest female character they could find. [MTV.com]

  • Google Nexus 5 Coming on October 30?
    Over/under on at least 25 news sources starting their reporting with, "Tomorrow might be Halloween, but today Android fans are getting their treats early!" Ugh. I hate that I'm so good at that. [Geeky Gadgets]

  • Is "Cortana" Microsoft's Voice-Controlled Personal Assistant?
    Look, I know she's a benevolent AI in the Halo series, but so was "MOTHER" and "HAL," until things got dicey. Just sayin', you shouldn't go tempting fate like that. You wouldn't call a computer network "Skynet" would you, even though Terminator is just a movie? (So, the conclusion is that we're all crazy, then?) [Win Beta]

  • Grand Theft Auto V Will Have In-game Micro-transactions?
    Rockstar rips you off as your in-game characters rip each other off. Life imitates art. [joystiq]


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Jeff Somogyi
Contributing Writer

Jeff Somogyi is constantly trying to come up with ways to surprise and delight audiences the world over. He takes humor seriously ... too seriously. (Honestly, we've never seen him laugh ... it's kinda creepy.)
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