By Jeff Somogyi, dealnews Media Editor With the iPhone 5 announcement event mere days ago, there are no new iPhone rumors ... but that didn't stop the good ole Internet from making other things up! Below are this week's lies, all cleaned up, snarked, and presented for your approval. We call this the "Rumor Roundup" and we do it all for you! This week: Is Doctor Strange in Thor 2? If he isn't, I'll bet the writers give a *wink* to this rumor by including dialog along the lines of: THOR: Who be YOU, mortal?! MAN IN LAB COAT: I'm a doctor of climatology! THOR: You are truly a strange doctor! [Thor then turns to the camera, removes his shirt, and flexes. (For the ladies, you know.)] [ComicBook.com] EA Offered Valve $1 Billion for Steam? Valve's co-founder, Gabe Newell, said he would rather have Valve "disintegrate" than sell it. EA reacted by shifting large sums of R&D cash into development of a disintegrator ray. [WeGotThisCovered] Nook Tablet Running Windows 8 to Be Announced? "What's that? Amazon updated their Kindle Fires to be really impressive... uh... uh... let's just cram something else new into our next one. What does Microsoft have? Perfect!" [MobileMag] Samsung Will Sue Apple Over 4G LTE Patents? Petty revenge lawsuits make both companies look like winners ... to the consumer! [Apple Insider] iTunes Headed to Russia, Selling Tracks for Less Than 99 Cents? Mr. President, we must not allow ourselves to fall behind in this music race. There can not be a music gap! P.O.E. [Today's iPhone] Jeff Somogyi is the dealnews Media Editor. He said, "Feed me, Jack!" And he was feeding you. He was feeding you. See more of his gammy thoughts on Google+, Twitter or on his blog. Follow @dealnews on Twitter for the latest roundups, price trend info, and stories. You can also sign up for an email alert for all dealnews features.