Rumor Roundup: Joss Whedon Heading to Star Wars? Siri Update?

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Jeff Somogyi
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Contributing Writer

When the Internet runs out of news, it starts making things up. We think this is funny, so we round up all the lies and speculation and put them here. We call it the "Rumor Roundup" and we do it all for you! This week:

iPhone Siri In Hand
  • Will an Update to Siri, Called "Proactive," Bring a More Google Now-like Experience to Apple?
    Adam Levine and Sarah Michelle Gellar have used it for years and they love it! (What? Different Proactiv?) [Information Week]

  • Will We See the Microsoft Band 2 Soon?
    Shall I give you a minute to remember there was a Microsoft Band 1? Then another moment to remember what it does? (I needed a few, myself, before I remembered — thought it was a musical thing, at first.) [VR-Zone]

Dual Lightsabers
  • Is Joss Whedon Directing 'Star Wars: Episode 9'?
    If that's the guy that did Avengers 2, then, uh, yeah, thanks but no thanks. If you mean the guy who did the first Avengers movie, then YES PLEASE! [Screen Crush]

  • Will the Next Transformers Movie Be a Prequel?
    What do you get when you have a live-action, big-budget movie without any live actors? (Why would they need them, when it's on Cybertron and everything could be CGI?) Is it still a live action movie, or an animated movie? Holy crow. This could be the loophole that the franchise needs to win an Oscar! [Blastr]

Cable Access Show
  • Will a Future Update Bring Live Local TV to the Apple TV?
    Turns out that by "local" they mean "network," most likely and not real local TV. You know, cable access? Where you can watch your chiropractor sit in a rocking chair, petting his dog, in front of an MSPaint-drawn fireplace while holiday music plays. Now that's local TV! [re/code]

  • Will an Update to Apple Pay Add a Rewards Program?
    You know, just like those "buy 10 coffees, get one free" punch cards. As soon as they can figure out how to make a punch-hole through your phone, without breaking it, it'll roll out. [Ubergizmo]

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Jeff Somogyi
Contributing Writer

Jeff Somogyi is constantly trying to come up with ways to surprise and delight audiences the world over. He takes humor seriously ... too seriously. (Honestly, we've never seen him laugh ... it's kinda creepy.)
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