Rumor Roundup: High-Grade Aluminum iPhone? Gosling Theft Auto?

Those, and other Internet rumors!

When the Internet runs out of news, it starts making things up. We think this is funny, so we round up all the lies and speculation and put them here. We call it the "Rumor Roundup" and we do it all for you! This week:

Balloon Fight
  • Is a New Pokemon Game on the Way?
    Look, this is a company that's released 14 sequels to Balloon Fight! You don't think they're not going to keep making new titles for their flagship IPs?! "Resting On Our Laurels" has been the motto of Nintendo for years. [Gamespresso]

  • Is Fallout 4 Twice as Big as Skyrim?
    I hope they release a normal-size version, too, so it can fit into our game console's disc slots. [Segment Next]

Aluminum Foil iPhone
  • Will Next-Gen iPhones Have Cases Made From High-Grade Aluminum?
    Your parents will annoyingly continue to refer to it as "tin," then launch into a story about how when they were kids, iPhones were covered in tin foil, and it's just a habit to call it that. And also that butter was called "oleo," or something dumb. [Ubergizmo]

  • Will a New Prince of Persia Be Announced at E3?
    I didn't know the old Prince had died! LONG LIVE THE PRINCE! (Pretty crazy that when drafting Persia's rules of succession, the writers had the forethought to include E3!) [Attack of the Fanboy]

Ryan Gosling Drive
  • Will Ryan Gosling Be the Star of Grand Theft Auto 6?
    Other leaked documents have suggested the main playable character in GTA6 refuses to eat cereal, so.... [CrossMap]

  • Is Microsoft Going to Offer $169 Laptops?
    No so long ago, that was the price Microsoft was charging to upgrade your OS to the latest version. No joke here, just pure, cold observation. [Ubergizmo]

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Jeff Somogyi
Contributing Writer

Jeff Somogyi is constantly trying to come up with ways to surprise and delight audiences the world over. He takes humor seriously ... too seriously. (Honestly, we've never seen him laugh ... it's kinda creepy.)
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